The Flamingos Are Watching You
by Selena Darkside
Summary: What do you do when your lawn flamingos come to life? Legalos is stalked by plasticpinkflamingosfromhell. And Aragorn is stalked by the plasticpinkMommaflamingofromhell. So what do you do when your lawn flamingos come to life? Lemons anyone?
1. Chapter 1: When They First Came

This is a story about pink flamingos...yeah...we don't own any of these characters, or anyone else from The Lord of the Rings. Except the flamingos!!! huggles one it may be pink, but it's cute, and we DO own them! Enjoy!

Aragorn,drunk as hell, runs around in his backyard screaming "I am insane with anger!" Legolas pops out of the bushes and tackles Aragorn crying, "AH! The flamingos of doom are after me!" "What, what do you mean?" Aragon said blinking a bit, "What flamingos?"  
"They're mad I tell you! They popped out off their sticks and now they're after me!!!" said Legalos as he squeezed his arms tightly around Aragorn. A few seconds later, a small plastic pink flamingo swayed across the grass and flopped pathetically towards them. "You see?! They're possessed or something!"  
Aragorn raised an eyebrow. "Riiight, I think you've been drinking too much." He said, somewhat sober again. "They are kinda cute though..."  
"......CUTE?! You think they're cute eh?...hey, you're kinda cute...," Legalos said as he wiped a few tears from his eyes, "Don't you think so?"  
"Yeah...." Aragorn said reaching up and whiping a few tears away from Legalos's eyes. "You're kinda...wait...NO!!!" Aragorn quickly said then shoved hm off, stood up and ran inside, hiding under his computer desk.  
Legalos falls into a puddle of mud, now crossing his arms and pouting. He looks up to see a plastic pink flamingo looking him right in the face. "AH NO!!!!," he screamed as he grabbed a shovel and beat the horrid plastic bird until there was nothing left but mud and the wire it stood on. He then looked up to see a gigantic formation of plastic pink flamingos staring straight at him with little beady black eyes. "What do you want from meeee!" he yelled at the plastic pinions of death as he clumsilly ran and jumped in the pool.  
Aragorn huddled beneath the small desk remembering the time when he once thought that he was gay and Arwin forced him to go to threapy and everytime he thought about a man in a wrong way they'd tazer him. Shudering the memory of he crawled out from beneath the desk, stood up and walked into the kitchen. He walked over to the frige and opened the door. He looked down and he saw a plastic soft-pink flamingo sitting on a carton of eggs. "...PANCAKES!!!! I'll make some pancakes." He said closing the frige door not thinking that you had to have eggs for pancakes. He walked over to the cabnets and got out the bowl, the mixture, the milk, (while carefully avoiding the plastic momma flamingo) and the other stuff. Remembering that the receipe called for 3 eggs, he walked back over to the frige and opened it then stared in sheer horror at the momma flamingo and quitely said " Pizza...that sounds good." And he shut the door and walked to the phone to order a pizza.  
Now in the pool, Legalos took off his shirt and pants-revealing black boxers with 'The Lord of the Rings' written all over them in gold writing. He swam around a bit and told himself, "Well, I'm sure glad flamingos can't swim..." Just then, a small kiddie pink intertube floated to him. There, sitting on the tube, was a plastic pink flamingio, legs crossed, with a cocoanut drink in its well...wings.  
Legalos fell back in the water floating in shock as the flamingo said in a squeaky little voice that reminded him of plastic, "But sure we can Legalos! Sure we can!" The plastic pink flamingo threw its cocoanut drink in the pool and swam after very slowly. The only part on his body Legalos could move was his eyes, so he looked around the sidewalk of the pool and saw nothing but plastic pink flamingos, still on their sticks and looking directly at him. 


	2. Chapter 2: PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA!

Yes, It is us again! yes, I say us because me and meh sis are writing this! AND WE ARE TWINS! muahahaha! (ahem) anywho...yes well, enjoy chappie 2!

Chapter 2: PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA!

After ordering his pizza he walked into the living room to sit down. There in his special leather recliner sat the momma pink plastic flamingo. Snarling angerly Aragorn spun around and ran to the armory to get his sword. Perched on his personal sword was a baby pink plastic flamingo and sitting next to it was the momma pink plastic flamingo. "This is insane!" he screamed, and stormed out of the rooom.

Legalos, still floating in the pool and not able to move, was scared shitless. He saw nothing but pink as the pink flamingo got right in his face and stared straight into his eyes. Those little beady black eyes, staring, waiting, watching...(Scary huh? Legalos thought so...) All of a sudden he brought himself out of his shock and grabbed the flamingo of hell by its neck, and held it under the water. The flamingo splashed and splashed trying to get back up. He forgot that plastic can't drown, so he wrung its plastic little neck until it stopped squirming. Suddenly, all of the plastic pink flamingos surrounding the pool jumped on Legalos and started pecking him with their plastic beaks.

Suddenly the doorbell rang. He walked to the door muttering about the pink flamingo. He looked around for the pizza dude but he saw no one. "I'm down here." Said a familiar voice. Aragorn looked down to find Pippin looking up at him, holding a pizza box.

> "Do I know you from somewhere?" He said as he pulled out his wallet

"Yeah..." Pippin said handing him the pizza box, "Maybe..." Aragorn could see inside the car down the driveway a little bit. All he could see was the top of someone's head. Pippin looked back behind him and yelled, "Mary! Don't take your foot off the brake!"

Aragorn handed him the money and went back inside just as the car started to roll down the driveway.

"No tip?" Pippin sneered as he ran back to the car yelling at Mary for letting go of the brake, and chasing the car.

Aragorn sat the pizza box down on the table, grabbed a piece of pizza, and went out the back door and in the backyard to get Legalos. "Legalos pizza's here!" He blinked for a minute staring at the now pink swimming pool. "Oh my god, its pink...hey it's kinda cute," he thought for a minute whith his hand on his chin, then yelled to Legalos, "LEGALOS! PIZZA!"

Standing in the shallow end of the pool, still in his boxers, (AND covered in plastic pecking pink flamingos), was Legalos. All Legalos heard was he word 'Pizza' and screamed, "PIZZA, PIZZA, PIZZA!" He packed a mean punch to all of those damn flamingos and shoved them off of him in a maximum of 10 seconds. He was in the house before the plastic pinions were able to regroup. He and Aragorn walked into the kitchen, got a slice of pizza, and went to the living room to eat and watch 'The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King'. A little bit throught the movie, Aragorn got up to go get another slice of pizza. He looked at the pizza box in terror. There, sitting on top of it, was the momma flamingo on a carton of eggs. Legalos was right behind him, but he didn't see the momma flamingo; all he was worried about was the pizza.

The plastic pink momma flamingo pecked at Legalos's had; he drew his hand back. Glaring at the plastic pink momma flamingo, he quickly grabbed the pizza box from under her and ran to his room. Aragorn, standing there wondering what the hell just went on, glared at the plastic bird of death. He shook his fist at the plastic pink momma flamingo and said, "Curse you for being...alive!" The plastic pink momma flamingo just squaked a bit and one of the eggs in the carton hatched, revealing a REAL pink flamingo.

Legalos slammed the door to his room, locked the door, plopped himself and the pizza down on the bed, and opened the pizza box.

In the kitchen, looking in awe at the little flamingo hatchling, (and wondering how the hell that was possible), Aragorn heard an extremely loud scream.

What will happen next? What was that horrid scream Aragorn heard? What will happen if the plastic pink momma flamingo keeps hatching REAL baby pink flamingos? Find out in chapter 3: Pink Chicks and Bubble Baths. hehe ok, well review and tell us whatcha think!


End file.
